Thursday, November 03, 2005
The Eve of My 30th
I can't believe that the time has come! I can't believe that I am entering into a new decade. That is my new term for it. My New Decade, it sounds so much better than 30.
I have tried to be reflective this week on this new decade. I can't believe that I will be leaving the good ole faithful 20's. I remember when I couldn't wait to be 20. I just wanted to get older. I wanted to be respected and looked up too. NOW I am leaving this safe place and entering into a new place that seems so unknown.
Yes, I sound crazy, especially to those who are already in their 30's. But do you remember where you were when you turned 30? Do you remember how you felt? I remember when my mom turned 30. She sat out on the driveway in lawn chairs with her friend and laughed at life. They laughed about getting old. My mom already had 3 kids and I thought she was so old. That day she got TONS of flowering honoring her. I was 10 years old. 30 was forever away. I thought that it was as far as eternity.
When I hear 30 I have a picture in my head and I am not it. HA! I really am not it. I think of the TV show, Thirty Something. I loved watching that show. I thought they were so old. They all had problems and kids, affairs and big issues. I never thought that it would be me turning old with problems and no kids. I can't see myself as a character on the show. Well, maybe I can!
Last year when I turned 29 I think I took it pretty hard just knowing that the next year was 30 and my life goals had not been accomplished. It is funny how we have a plan for our lives and a picture of what we want it to be. I spent a lot of time last year mourning those things lost or that never came to be. Now that I am entering into my new decade I am going to celebrate me!
My friends who are 30 say that it is a good year. It is a good decade. Tracy says that she feels more relaxed and together than ever before. K says that it is a good place to be. I really hope they are all right. I am not liking getting older but I can at least have fun doing it!!!!